Now that the anxiety of a first post is behind me, my 2nd post is going to be about the anxiety of my first post.
I’m serious.
For my first “Going Mental” post, I was stuck on it being “something”. A real SOMETHING, you know? I wanted it to be important. Impactful. I wanted it to MEAN something…
…And then I remembered that nothing means anything and I softly cried to myself.
After the tears subsided, the first post came out of me with exactly the ease that was intended for it. It was a matter of shifting my thinking from ‘I NEED TO FINISH THIS AND IT NEEDS TO BE AMAZING’ to ‘I’m just gonna say what I want to say and make it super simple.’
That’s the thing about results-based anxiety. It’s so common to put pressure on what should be, could be, might be, might not be, NEEDS TO BE, that the damn thing can hardly even snag a chance to “be” period!
Anytime I’ve been able to actually MAKE something, whatever it is, it hasn’t come out of that place of tense pressure, that baited breath demanding nature, rigid and objective-driven and forced and gross. Anytime I’ve been able to make something, it’s come from a simple, light-hearted place of ease. It almost sounds counterintuitive, but it’s not. This more creative, fun way of thinking actually has a name, and it’s called…
Process thinking.
Process thinking, also known as ‘”the process”‘ is a philosophy that emphasizes preparation and hard work over consideration of outcomes or results.
I first learned about process thinking in January and since then I’ve increasingly utilized the style of thinking more and more in my own life.
As a naturally goal-oriented, list-making, creepy-level results-driven lady, process thinking can simultaneously feel liberating and terrifying, like a free fall through your own mind.
I found that when I switched from results/objective based thinking to process thinking, I was initially anxious and doubtful. How could I POSSIBLY get anything done if I wasn’t fixated on the objective of making every single thing THE BEST THING THAT’S EVER BEEN MADE?!
(I think I need to cool it with the caps, it’s getting to be a little much…)
Anyway, after the initial process thinking growing pains, I found that the ideas coming out of me were less judged, more suited for my point of view, and frankly, way more abundant.
When I was exclusively results-oriented, I’d get frustrated with my progress (or lack thereof), quit goals frequently, assign new ones, beat myself up for not finishing, and the negative cycle would continue.
With process thinking, I noticed I started finishing more of my projects, taking less time on projects because I was so passionate about what I was working on, and I didn’t have as much worry or negativity toward myself. I couldn’t come up with a downside to process thinking if I tried.
I think that difference in thinking is a key to creativity and a better quality of life. Chasing outcomes and results can cause the process of whatever it is you’re working on to feel arduous and frustrating. Encouraging and focusing on the process itself can cause the process to feel rewarding, fun, and motivating.
Have you heard of process thinking? Do you use it in your own life? Are there other styles of thinking that you find helpful for you?
Looking forward to reading your thoughts.
– Jennette
I had never heard of process thinking before reading this post. It makes a lot of sense to me. Preparation and hard work. I have often come down on myself for being lazy… or unprepared. Or both. But if this is the kind of thinking going on in the world today, it gives me hope.
I love this article! One thing that I have that many of your other followers don’t is probably too many years of wisdom! I think in your 20s, it’s an important time to figure out exactly who you are as a person and always be true to that. In younger years, we tend to try to please others and that’s OK. But your 20s is a time for self exploration, realizing and understanding the world is bigger than yourself, working out how you feel about issues and people who really matter to you. As a woman in my early 20s,… Read more »
Very wise words I wish you lots of luck and positivity JenMcFair
❤️
I’m sorry to have read you lost your mom a few years ago. I too have had that happen in 2012, I lost my mom to cancer. I’ve seen your videos and I feel we’re really similar. I understand a lot where your coming from, or as they say, I catch your drift. P.S. I’m like the epitome of process thinking. If we chatted for 5 minutes, you’d be all like whoaaaaah… Haha
Thanks for writing back and your condolence, it means a lot hearing from you, I watched you for many years, and I like the quote that you remembered. Keep up the great work with everything, I respect you more then any other actress/celeb because you care about your fans and you share your stories like this about anxiety and your life experiences and struggles, which I sometimes can relate to in my own life, (as a 21 year old college student). I was always taught to strive for better and be the best you can be, and I wish you… Read more »
I have been using process thinking for the past year in my field of work. I was a graduate last year in civil engineering, and now am a project manager for a asphalt paving company. In every project you want to think of the final result, making money and getting the best outcome in the shortest period of time. When focused purely on those end results, there is a lot of room to make small mistakes that give you an undesirable outcome. So this leads to the process thinking. In completing a project, the most important thing in preparation. With… Read more »
Noticed that you and others talk about anxiety. It’s an issue for many people, including myself. Spent a lot of sleepless nights worrying about family, financial, and work. As someone who has spent many decades on this planet, here’s what I have to offer. As you work on future projects, your experience will allow you to gain knowledge. With this knowledge, your ability to handle issues will improve, which will lead to greater confidence. Greater confidence will lead to less stress. Then, what was once insurmountable issues, becomes a minor annoyance, easily solved. Now, not all anxiety will go away,… Read more »
From what you’ve written, I think you’re a wise person.
You look like a good family father of happy days.
Things are much simpler and more concrete than we are carry on to see them.
Stress, like other bad habits, is often a drug. We need it, and in the meantime it destroys the quality of our lives. And probably the deep reason is always the same from the night of the times. Do not accept that often things are just as they are, there are no valid explanations, there is no sense, or swimm or drowning, the rest does not matter. Many things are done because … why not? … and stop. And we learn so little from the experiences of others … and yet … they are very similar … we are very… Read more »
And again, I think, I’m exhausted for nothing.
But now I have a good habit, I’m no longer a drama, and I have some fun.
Why not?
(Pt 2). Honest question; Do you think that the fact that you have a built-in audience makes your process of “process thinking” (vís-a-vis guaranteed feedback) a bit easier? Or do you think you’d ask the same questions into an empty forrest?
Interesting point.
One type of trawl fishing.
The need to have attentions, everyone tries to get it in his own way.
Hey Jeannette, Yes…. I have used process thinking… but have yet to master it…. I’ve been journaling for most of my adult life, and for about seven or so years, blogged on Blogspot… With my very might, upon crossing the blog threshold, I wanted to be heard (the first fatal flaw)… I barfed out emotions, divulged deep thoughts, shared letters, waxed poetic, and even shared recipes!… but had very few readers (the desire of which was my second fatal flaw)… I continue to journal (though not as much as I want to). You however, have an pretty-much built-in audience; a… Read more »
First I would like to say, this is a wonderful written piece. As a writer, I love seeing people who take the time to share their stories or blog about what is on their mind. I have a website as well, actually do some blogging and post inspirational things on Facebook and Instagram at http://www.instagram.com/TeamAwesome418. The Team Awesome movement is what I started a few years ago. A split audience for wrestling fans and positive people in general but enough tooting my horn. Let’s get back to you, for a person dealing with anxiety, I say to remind yourself that… Read more »
I’m Bipolar 2 and I have anxiety issues among other things wrong with my head, lol. I like the sound of Process Oriented Thinking. My brain is going in 100 different directions at once and I think maybe it may help me to concentrate on projects as well as finish them. Lol.
I also like the info you gave Miss Gabriela, that will help me a lot.
I can’t wait for your next post Miss Jeannette. This is really interesting.
I had never heard of process thinking until I read this post. It makes sense, in a way, to focus on the process. But I must say I do find myself working towards results in everything I do. It just works for me, you know? Most of the things I have to accomplish are university-related and I work best when ticking steps off a to-do list. I don’t really know how I would incorporate a more process-based way of handling projects, especially since I don’t have the time to figure out if it works for me. The way I’m currently… Read more »
Ciao. The first step should be to know Why do you publicly write what you think, how do you think? What answers do you expect? Why do I answer you? What do I expect from my answer? Perhaps my answer will not be too boring, annoying, useless. Probably you already realize that my style of thought is result-oriented. And so be often under pressure. You probably do not want to know why I had this gift (or damage), and then why I wanted and cultivated it. Maybe you’re interested in knowing I’ve partially escaped, fled from it. First I tried… Read more »
I’m a songwriter and musician, I use my imagination more than my brain! I do get what you’re saying about Process Thinking, I’m going to try that next time I’m writing a song! I’ll get back to you! Blessings
First of all, I wanna to say that I’m happy and proud that now you have a blog. In second, I wanna talk about this post. Okay, I have a blog too, small but it’s my baby haha ❤, and I understand what is sit down and get desperate about write something that really really worth be read. In a world where shit is more valuable then knowledge, is hard to catch the people’s attention, but the people who come to ours blogs don’t have idea of how hard was to put out what we wanna tell. Write is my… Read more »
I’m a peer support specialist and I love helping others with anxiety, and depression. But may I just say you are doing a awesome job writing everything down on how you feel. It’s always best not to bottle things up. And on a side note I’ve always been a fan of yours and love how you call yourself mama .
I sometimes lost the hope of my self, how do you do to stay strong?
if you ask God for guidance he will give it to you. He will give you contentment and peace of mind. Try to focus on spiritual things and read the bible. The bible is like an instruction manual of life if you use it. It will give you advice, teach you and good for discipline.
I try to be in the moment rather than being stuck in the past or planning for the future. I say try, because it isn’t easy. Since the very beginning of our lives, everyone is telling us to plan for our futures. That makes it harder for us to change how we act mentally. It can become stressful if we do too much which makes us feel overwhelmed. But, we can re-enforce our way of thinking by repeating phrases, (i.e. “whatever happens, happens” and “life moves on”). No one is perfect. Even the most successful stories has failures. Speaking of… Read more »
i love this!!
I know life can be stressful but you can ask God to give you unnatural strength, lean on to God and he will help you. Throw your burden to God and he will make you positive. Constantly pray from what are you anxious about and he will make you firm and strong. Sometimes life could make you feel weak and you can not go on anymore, that’s normal for all of us. That’s why we should trust god with all our heart that he will carry you with his right hand of righteousness.
Sometimes I have the anxiety of the study career is not appropriate since I am changing at a time I would like to be a tutor or teacher in a school or specialize in the beauty part, but at another time I would like to pursue career as an actress. If I’m changeable) and that stresses me enough because I feel that I’m not layers to cope (most people my age already know their future) and I instead I’m stuck and sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night thinking this my future, I’m a mess What advice… Read more »